I’m not in the business of helping Republicans. After all, I’m repeatedly on record saying that the whole world would instantly be rescued from almost all of its woes if the Republican party in America suddenly disappeared.
But I’ve been listening to the high-pitched whining about the “double standard” for Democrats and Republicans since Trump’s indictment last week, and I think I see a way for them to get out of this so very unfair trap that they just can’t seem to understand.
Here is my tip, Republicans: Just stop electing criminals.
Problem solved!
Oh, wait. I forgot that you would have to be decent people to recognize criminals in the first place. And you only care about power, so you’ll elect anybody who seems like he or she will get it for you, no matter how degenerate or corrupt they are.
So I guess my tip, while a good one, is not something you can act on, since a criminal looks just like anyone else to you.
Sorry, I forgot.
But while we’re on the subject of the “double standard,” let’s remember some history.
Republican President Richard Nixon was a criminal. He got off without any indictment.
Republican President Ronald Reagan abused power in the Iran-Contra affair. He got off without any indictment.
Republican President George H. W. Bush abused power by pardoning the Iran-Contra felons, thus putting the lid on Reagan’s abuse of power. He got off without any indictment.
Republican President George W. Bush and Republican Vice President Dick Cheney abused power by lying America into the Iraq War and conducting that war like barbarians, with secret jails and torture. They got off without any indictments. (Hell, ol’ W just sits around painting cats these days.)
Republican President Donald J. Trump committed so many crimes and abuses of power during his four-year stint as pretend-president that it’s amazing the country is still standing. So far, he has escaped facing justice for anything—until now.
Oh, but I guess that Republicans don’t care how much crime they get away with. They only care about the crime they get caught for. That shouldn’t happen to them. They expect to get away with everything.
So now they are whining like five-year-olds who got caught with their hands in the cookie jar. It’s so unfair! Somebody else took a cookie and didn’t get caught. Why should I get caught?
Really? I know these people stopped maturing at about five, but didn’t their parents teach them that someone else’s getting away with bad behavior doesn’t excuse you from the consequences of bad behavior?
They whine, whine, whine about how Democrats get away with things. Hmm. If I look at the list above and match that against Bill Clinton not getting indicted, Hillary Clinton not getting indicted, Barack Obama not getting indicted, and Joe Biden not getting indicted, it looks to me like Republicans have still gotten away with a lot more. Especially since Bill’s great crime was only lying about illicit sex in the Oval Office and Hillary, Barack, and Joe didn’t do a damn thing wrong except in the conspiracy-fevered brains of Republicans.
Look, the bottom line is this. Republicans are just more conscienceless than Democrats. They will use power to get what they want in ways that Democrats, by and large, won’t.
Oh, sure, there are some corrupt Democrats. But the mindless false equivalence of the thoughtless masses who say “All politicians are the same” is nonsense. On the whole, Republicans are worse people than Democrats. And that’s why Republicans get in so much trouble. Also because so many of them are so incredibly stupid that they can’t restrain themselves from saying the quiet part—that is the evil part—out loud.
This is not just bigotry. The cause of Republican degeneracy is that they are far more fearful than Democrats and far more fearful than is good for human beings. They require layers upon layers of protection to hide their fears from themselves, including pretending to high moral standards when they have virtually none, pretending to a fierce patriotism when they don’t know the meaning of the word, and pretending that wielding power like a tyrant is actually defending the Constitution. It’s all a big show to hide from themselves that they are deathly afraid—of losing the ability to enjoin their personal social prejudices on others, of losing the ability to make others bow to their personal religious prejudices, of losing their ability to enforce on others their personal racial prejudices, of losing their ability generally to make others do what they want, and a whole host of other fears that they try to keep hidden, but can be discerned by any decent person from a distance because they pour out of their fear-filled mouths like hoards of cockroaches.
Hillary was right, but too polite, when she called them “deplorables.” They are actually “despicables.”
So, they will whine about the “double standard.” Let them whine. And stamp their feet. And threaten to shred the Constitution and destroy the country before they give up one iota of their hatred of everything that triggers the bottomless pit of fears that is the “conservative” soul.
For the rest of us, here’s a tip.
Since Republicans can’t be better people, let’s get them the hell away from government, where they can’t do anything but harm. Stop listening to what they say, since it’s all self-serving lies, deceptions, and distractions. And don’t even waste a millisecond thinking about whether you should vote for a Republican. You shouldn’t. Not until they have been out of power long enough to get the lesson that they need to be better people if they want to take meaningful part in government.
It’ll take a long time. It took eighty years for them to get this bad. So let’s say another eight decades in the wilderness of the permanent minority sounds about right. Maybe a few of them will have learned how to be decent people by then.
But I, for one, am not holding my breath.
Thanks for your support, Tommy. It's always good to know someone out there is liking this.
Best,
Scott
Such a radical idea!!
Stop electing and nominating criminals!!
Nah…too logical.
Always Be Criming!!
Keep up this amazing writing and you’ll persuade me to upgrade